We were in the Nashville Greyhound station, me, Jade, Mike, and his girlfriend, Lace. Mike is a mechanic, professional on the job, but has a bizarre side (blue hair, to this day), Lace was prissy and obnoxious. Jade was a recovering drug addict who used music to keep her motivated from using again, and one of the sweetest people I've met (she now works at a rehab center and has been clean for almost ten years). And, then you have me. Is this any wonder why it's going to be weird?
We had an hour wait for our bus that turned into a five hour wait. An hour in, Mike points to a man wearing a white robe, sandles, and long brown hair with full facial hair. Mike points this poor man out to us, and Jade starts laughing. "Dude," he said to me. "I think that may be Jesus." Too bad there weren't any escalators and a guy dressed as Freakazoid. You can imagine how this may go on. Trust me, if you were me, you'd be shocked.
So, there we were, in a bus station with a guy dressed as the Messiah. Two kids started playing with the guns from the House of the Dead 2 arcade cabinet, screaming racial slurs. Our Bus Station Savior did nothing to intervene, but there mother did. We had decided that he wasn't actually Jesus. An hour later, he falls a sleep watching Dazed and Confused, a movie whose title described us pretty damn well at that moment. Why would Jesus be watching a movie about stoners?
An hour later, Mike points out that he isn't breathing seemingly. Our dialogue went like this:
Mike: I think Jesus is dead.
Me: Uh, should someone check.
Jade: I'm not touching him. If he isn't Jesus, he might have something.
Lace: Ewww... Like lice.
Me: We can't just leave him here.
Mike: Maybe he died for our sins? *silence amongst us* Okay, that was terrible. Maybe he's just a sleep.
Jade: I hope so.
A little while later, and a few bus announcements later, our bus is finally called to await boarding. Mike and I turn and point out that "Jesus" had just then snapped back up, looking around like a confused Alzheimer's patient. It was now only a matter of time before we could look back at this an laugh. There's no way that anyone of us would ever find out if he was really Jesus, but at least we could laugh about it. As it was, it was a funny story.
For Mike, that's never good enough. Jade and I stared at Jesus as he started gaining lucidity. Lace was just filing her nails (I'm still amazed that she had any left at this point). Mike, on the other hand, realizing what he had just witnessed, raised his hands to the heavens, and rang out in a loud booming voice, "HE HAS RISEN!!!" The whole bus station went silent. Lace stopped filing her nails. Jade and I laughed. Jesus looked around confused. Obviously not liking the attention Mike, still with his arms raised, brought on us, Lace says, "If you get us kicked off of the bus, you're paying for the rest of the trip!"
Luckily, we didn't get kicked off the bus. But, we never did figure out why that guy was wearing the robe and sandles. Maybe, just maybe, he was part of a cult. Maybe he was really Jesus. I'm thinking, more than likely that he was just a crazed stoner. Either way, we saw something that no one else can brag about: The story of Easter re-enacted in a bus station in Tennessee. That, or a stoner that fell asleep while dressed as the Lord.
